Last month, in this space, I introduced you to my friend Frank, the former New York City firefighter to whom I offered counsel about the more dangerous wildlife that make their home here.
It’s a little primer I offer friends and relatives who move to San Diego to caution them about animals such as rattlers, mountain lions and coyotes.
Regrettably, I’ve been lax about informing them of another common species called homo sapiens, commonly known as your neighbor.
But in this case, contrary to the warnings I convey about dangerous wildlife, the more important counsel I should be providing is to let transplants know that the locals are harmless.
It’s a difficult challenge because of the deep-rooted distrust most New Yorkers harbor against strangers.
They’re taught early on to remain distant and never make eye contact. It’s part of what they call being “streetwise,” knowing how to conduct yourself in a precarious environment.
On its surface, eye contact may appear to be a benign exercise, but New Yorkers know failure to divert your eyes could easily be the first stage of an inevitable escalation, a foreboding incident that, tragically, often leads to conversation.
An example of such a perilous consequence is no better illustrated than in one of the most famous movie quotes of all time, offered by the Oscar-winning actor, Robert De Niro, in his role in the film “Taxi Driver,” where he poses the menacing question: “You talkin’ to me?”
Make no mistake, he wasn’t seeking to clarify who was being addressed.
It’s a common reply directed to anyone so brazen as to address an individual without a formal introduction.
You can glean that the question was a threat, not only because it was posed three consecutive times, but also because it was followed by the additional inquiry: “Then who the hell else are you talkin’ to?”
The queries were obvious signs of hostile intent.
Like the gun.
It’s why New Yorkers don’t like to engage with strangers.
It’s a habit that’s difficult to break. I learned that the hard way when I moved here from Brooklyn. The first time someone approached me, I handed over my watch.
Naturally, I regretted losing it since it was a lovely designer timepiece. Still, it was a small sacrifice considering I probably escaped a mugging.
Fortunately, I still have six similar watches left. They normally cost several thousand dollars, but I bought them on Canal Street in lower Manhattan for $10 apiece. I used to have an even dozen, but that was before I realized their main function was to tell time.
But that was all in the past. It may have taken me a while, but I eventually learned people here are genuinely friendly. They will engage you in conversation for the sole purpose of congeniality, not for any malevolent objective.
“Have a nice day!” they’re quick to say, with absolutely no ulterior motives.
It’s beautiful San Diego, where the sun shines bright, the people are welcoming, and if you like your watch, you can keep your watch.
Contact humor columnist Irv Erdos at IrvErdos@aol.com.
The Link LonkAugust 23, 2020 at 08:02PM
https://www.sandiegouniontribune.com/communities/north-county/story/2020-08-23/column-talking-to-strangers-with-little-danger
Column: Talking to strangers with little danger - The San Diego Union-Tribune
https://news.google.com/search?q=little&hl=en-US&gl=US&ceid=US:en
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